Stupid Hypotheticals - Axis and Allies

"Lets Just Drive" (lets-just-drive)
02/18/2014 at 00:55 • Filed to: None

Here's the challenge: You have to pick three cars, one from each nation depending on which side you chose. You can do the Axis thing and pick a German car, an Italian car and a Japanese car or you can do the Allied thing and pick an American car, a British car and... I guess a Russian or Australian car (or any other automobile producing, then-allied country).

Myself?

I hate to admit it, but I'm picking Axis.

DISCUSSION (47)

beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 00:58

what do you do when you've picked them? or is this just a lets highlight 3 cars because why not?

Lets Just Drive > beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard
02/18/2014 at 01:00

You could fap to them, create 3d printed versions and insert them in your anus, combine all three to form a MegaZord or even race them against various inconceivable objects but you may not, by any means or for any reason, "highlight 3 cars because why not?"

We good?

Yossarian > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:00

Kinja'd!!!

B0om.

Manuél Ferrari > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:01

Hmm maybe you should limit the cars to be those that were made after WWI and before and during WWII?

MtrRider > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:01

Allies it is. The Germans have nothing on these.

Kinja'd!!!

Lets Just Drive > Yossarian
02/18/2014 at 01:02

Hah. In writing this, your answer brings up the question I was asking myself; how overwhelmingly is the Axis going to win this war?

Lets Just Drive > Manuél Ferrari
02/18/2014 at 01:02

If you feel like it, go ahead.

This isn't for like, money or anything.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:03

Don't forget about Canada! Your options with them are the Bricklin SV-1 and... umm... umm.......... that's all I can think of.

ddavidn > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:03

Oh man, I thought we were going to try and play the board game over Kinja. Which would be like playing with a two-year-old.

I definitely agree with your choices, but I'll go Allied.

Ute

Kinja'd!!!

Lotus

Kinja'd!!!

Ford

Kinja'd!!!

I could do a lot better, but this is off the top of my head.

Lets Just Drive > MtrRider
02/18/2014 at 01:03

All good picks.

I'm pretty sure I know which one you'd DD.

Ha!

Lets Just Drive > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
02/18/2014 at 01:04

As a Canadian, I forgot about Canada eh.

I'm sorry. I don't know what that's all a boot.

Lets Just Drive > ddavidn
02/18/2014 at 01:04

All great choices, imho.

Leadbull > Yossarian
02/18/2014 at 01:04

Italy is a free pass for both sides.

MtrRider > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:05

Which one is that!?

Manuél Ferrari > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:05

haha true!

ok i'll do that now. just for the hell of it.

Yossarian > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:05

As much as I like the Allied cars. There's just so many good choices for the Axis powers.

Lets Just Drive > Manuél Ferrari
02/18/2014 at 01:06

Keep Calm and Pick Three Cars.

Conversely...

Goose step your way into three cars.

MtrRider > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
02/18/2014 at 01:06

Chryslers are made in Canada. You can choose the Charger or 300 or something.

Lets Just Drive > Yossarian
02/18/2014 at 01:07

Right?

But when you're making your choice based on the qualifier "Axis Versus Allied" isn't going Axis like... really bad?

I mean, I did the same because I like the cars or whatever, but for the reasons of this, I think we're terrible people. Soooo, they killed a bunch of Jews... but just look at their sport sedans!

Yeah, I feel bad for typing that.

MtrRider > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:07

Kinja'd!!!

Lets Just Drive > MtrRider
02/18/2014 at 01:11

Kinja'd!!!

For Sweden > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:12

Kinja'd!!!

Allies!

YSI-what can brown do for you > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:13

I shall choose the side of the Axis!!

Kinja'd!!!

Manuél Ferrari > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:14

I don't know how to be calm...

Axis

Italy - 1932 Alfa Romeo 8C

Kinja'd!!!

Germany - 1930 Mercedes SSK

Kinja'd!!!

Now here is a twist - since the French were defeated and occupied by Ze Germans I'm allowed to pick Bugatti

Vichy France - 1938 Bugatti Type 57SC Atlantic

Kinja'd!!!

beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:15

hmm, well if we're inserting them into body cavities they should be aerodynamic.

Germany, Luigi Colani had many great ideas that would be less painful:

Kinja'd!!!

Starting with a small car to begin with would be another bonus: Japan's Daihatsu Midget

Kinja'd!!!

Then I suppose if we're gonna shove anything up there it may as well be a classic (with no sharp edges, sorry Countach)

Kinja'd!!!

ddavidn > Yossarian
02/18/2014 at 01:16

A-mazing.

Lets Just Drive > YSI-what can brown do for you
02/18/2014 at 01:16

Mmmm. Nice.

ddavidn > MtrRider
02/18/2014 at 01:16

Epic win.

Lets Just Drive > Manuél Ferrari
02/18/2014 at 01:17

Just...

... wow.

ddavidn > YSI-what can brown do for you
02/18/2014 at 01:17

It's just hard not to pick a German car, so the Axis wins this war pretty well.

Lets Just Drive > beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard
02/18/2014 at 01:17

Well played, good sir. Well played indeed.

ddavidn > beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard
02/18/2014 at 01:17

We race them, duh.

YSI-what can brown do for you > ddavidn
02/18/2014 at 01:19

I had a hard time picking a German car. I wasn't sure if I wanted an AMG or an old Audi.

Manuél Ferrari > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:20

I thought you might like the twist at the end :D

ddavidn > YSI-what can brown do for you
02/18/2014 at 01:21

There are so many good ones! But I think you made the right choice. Not that there's a wrong choice.

Lets Just Drive > Manuél Ferrari
02/18/2014 at 01:21

That's what she said.

BAM!

Leadbull > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:24

Kinja'd!!!

I'm not a part of your system.

Deal Killer - Powered by Focus > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:24

Aw man, I thought you were talking about the game. Axis & Allies is a great game. I haven't played it since the mid 90's. It's right up there with Talisman and Risk in my book.
But as for the car thing, I'd go for the allies:
American: A Ram 1500 Quad Cab with the new Diesel engine. Americans make the best trucks.
England: The new F-type coupe with that wonderful sounding V-8.
France (Gov't in exile) A 1970's Citroen SM, with that Maserati V-6, as Italy changed sides towards the end of the war anyway.

Dale Franks > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:27

You could fap to them, create 3d printed versions and insert them in your anus...

See, now I really don't want to play the game at all. Especially after going to my doctor for a checkup today.

Manuél Ferrari > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 01:31

Kinja'd!!!

puddler > Lets Just Drive
02/18/2014 at 02:24

Kinja'd!!!

methinks i'm doing it wrong.

Simplify, then add beer > ddavidn
02/18/2014 at 02:56

I think that Ford was built in Belgium. How does neutrality count here?

Distraxi's idea of perfection is a Jagroen > Manuél Ferrari
02/18/2014 at 04:08

..and this is why the Allies will win. The Axis has power, precision, and technology. But the Allies have class, panache, and most importantly, bags and bags of money!

UK: Rolls Royce Phantom III

Kinja'd!!!